Speaker 1:
Growing up, I didn’t feel safe at home. And I was picked on a lot at school. When I was 14, I tried alcohol for the first time. I loved how it made me feel. This is how I’ve always wanted to feel, like everyone else. I thought I was managing my life with my drinking. However, I became more isolated. Over time, I found myself lying to loved ones, hiding alcohol, and keeping secrets. All so that I could drink without judgment. I never wanted to get to the place where people would say-
Speaker 2:
“She’s ruining her life.”
Speaker 3:
“Look at that drunk.”
Speaker 4:
“Why would she choose alcohol over her family?”
Speaker 5:
“I don’t get it.”
Speaker 6:
“Why is she drinking herself to death?”
Speaker 3:
“Worthless.”
Speaker 1:
I started to feel that I was doing this to myself, and alcohol was more important. How did I get here? Did I really choose addiction? I chose to take a drink, like most of my friends, but I didn’t choose to have an addiction. I realized that living well for myself was the key, which inspired me to learn more about what made me different from my peers, why I became addicted to alcohol, but they didn’t.
Speaker 1:
The part of our brain that keeps us well can have devastating effects if it doesn’t work properly. The area of the brain directly behind your forehead is known as the prefrontal cortex. This area is kind of like the brain’s executive control. One of its major roles is regulating different pathways in the brain, such as the fear and reward pathways.
Speaker 1:
For example, when we experience traumatic events, the prefrontal cortex activates the fear pathway and signals to another brain structure called the amygdala, which processes fear. In turn, the amygdala may activate another brain area known as the hippocampus, which stores information about threatening people, places, or things. In the future, when we encounter them, the hippocampus will remind us to avoid them. On the other hand, it seems that the reward pathway is less active after trauma. It’s possible that substances such as alcohol or heroin are used in an effort to feel better.
Speaker 1:
So what does this mean? Why did my brain think that alcohol was a good coping strategy? Scientists now believe that while the reward pathway is underactive following trauma, the fear pathway is overactive. Remember the prefrontal cortex? Well, it can’t do its job properly to balance the two pathways. So my brain presented the solution to keep drinking, which increases reward and decreases the fear I lived with. At this point, it wasn’t about being happy. It was about surviving.
Speaker 1:
Learning that there were real changes in my brain allowed me to be kinder to myself and realize that addiction was not my choice. That being said, I don’t want to go back to who I was when I started drinking. When I thought I was the problem, there wasn’t much to be done. When I realized something was wrong with my mind, then I knew change was possible. I learned that if I could change my mind, I could change my life and form a new path for myself.
Speaker 1:
Even though we talked about how trauma can lead to addiction, there are many other factors that can also contribute to someone developing an addiction, such as genetics, personality, and mental illness. There’s so much value in learning about addiction. And I believe it is the key to reducing stigma. Stigma around addiction is very real, and it is the biggest barrier for people trying to seek treatment. Join the movement with thousands of others working to reduce stigma around substance use and addiction. Visit capsa.ca for more information.
